Fight

Hi Dad,

I write to you because I know you can’t stay connected to us anymore…I write because there is still so much I want to say and if I try to do it face to face…I will falter because I will see the disconnect…and it quiets me.

But what I want to say is…Fight.  Fight the fine layer of grayness that has enveloped you…Fight the indifference…Fight the confusion…Fight for us….and you.

It feels like we have already lost so many parts of you…and I see the next phase coming…damn it….Fight.

And I will fight to stay vocal…and connected to you…even if it feels you are a million miles away…or maybe I’m the one that’s a million miles away…a safe distance from “that layer of gray” that steals all that is good in the world.

I want you to sit at the kitchen table with us…even when you would rather retreat to the basement…again.  I want you to pet the dog…you love dogs…you just don’t remember.  I want you to enjoy walking again…even if it’s just around the yard. I want you to laugh…I want you to Fight with the passion you had for decades debating all things “Democrat.”

There is a song I love called “You can let go now Daddy.”  But you can’t let go…not yet…I still need you here…ask me your questions…hide in your basement…stick your tongue out…have your accidents…but hang on…and Fight.

 

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